That’s an interesting question! I think I can only add anecdotal points, but I do think it can be hard to have a healthy relationship with certain kinds of musicians. With the more famous guys it’s easy to get insecure, like “am I good enough for him?” - I’ve found myself wondering that. You see famous people on TV surrounded by happy beautiful people and you can’t help but compare yourself to that, you know?
Most of the guys I’ve known have been nice people, but in the beginning I was associating with some headfucks basically. They thought that because they were a “rockstar” that the world owed them something. That groupies around them were beautiful adoring accessories and not people with feelings, wants and needs of their own. There’s a definite power imbalance at times. I am still learning to look for the signs, like is this relationship equal? Am I getting what I want as much as the other person is?, or is one of us being used here? I always tell other girls that you don’t sleep with someone if they, the other person, are looking for a one night stand, but you have genuine feelings for them. Only enter into equal relationships! “Use” them as much as they “use” you.
There are definitely some nasty people out there, and being in a band can really bring out the bad sides of people. Unfortunately that’s one thing groupies witness quite a lot, cos a lot of us are in the “inner sanctum” after all. And since a lot of groupies start out as teenagers, manipulation can happen - some musicians have no qualms in taking advantage of the good nature and naivety of younger groupies. People and society tell men that they should desire younger women and be animals about it, and people believe that so a lot of girls get mistreated…but that’s one of the things we are trying to work against with this blog. Girls don’t have to take shit off people just cos they’re in a respected band. If you’re treated negatively, say Fuck That and leave, who gives if they’re playing shows to thousands of people?
But to answer your question, it doesn’t happen either not at all or frequently, it’s more of a case of who you’re around. It isn’t uncommon, but I don’t think every groupie has had a relationship where they’re mistreated in a powerplay.
Posted on 29th July 2014 with 1 note
I’m sure you’ll figure out what works best for you over time. I’m also not talkative, I’m quite introverted and I don’t necessarily need to surround myself with people to make myself happy - that’s how I am as a groupie, too. I have a few good friends who understand that I am quiet, and that suits me fine - maybe you’ll have that if you want it.
If you find yourself a great musician then you might have to use your best conversation to get to know them, or there might be some simple chemistry without having to crack jokes or careful conversation planning. You just don’t know until it actually happens!
What I’m trying to say if don’t feel that you need to magically become chatty. No groupie should feel the need to change themselves just to please a musician - the musicians should come chasing you :) I really don’t think that being mysterious is a bad thing, just be confident in who you are and get out there to have some fun and hear some good music!
Posted on 28th July 2014 with 0 notes
Hi Miss C
Thanks for reading the blog, we’re happy we helped even in a small way :)
Posted on 27th July 2014 with 0 notes
It’s a massive thing about ’70s/’80s/beyond TV hosts, radio presenters - Rolf Harris, Jimmy Saville are the worst ones. They abused children and teenagers. People in positions of power and respect that are misusing people’s trust horrendously, and people around them let them get away with it for years, like they thought “they’re on TV so they must be nice really”. And Jimmy Page happens to also be a famous guy from the 70s, so people cover up for him aswell (although of course it’s hard to say that his stuff is the same as Harris or Saville, cos we just don’t know).
I know a lot of led Zeppelin fans aren’t going to like that, but it’s a fact that Jimmy Page is creepy as fuck. It legitimately concerns me when I see young women and girls sticking up for men like this one.
Posted on 26th July 2014 with 0 notes
Thanks for the question. I think reading about the baby groupies was one of the first times I had heard groupie stories…I can’t imagine going through what they did, around ten years younger than I am now. I admire girls for their strength of will, their spirits - these were some ballsy people! Especially so soon after the sexual revolution…but even now people struggle to comprehend that women have unique dreams, desires, not everyone wants to lead the same life. God forbid that she wants to get to know the people that inspire her!
Of course, there is a dark side. I read people who try to excuse the abuse the bands dealt them by saying “oh that’s just how it was back then”…I strongly disagree with that. I won’t make excuses for rock stars such as Jimmy Page, Bowie, Iggy Pop, Johnny Thunders, Stiv Bators etc…they were having sex with minors, they were abusing their positions of power. People say “but the girls wanted it” - does the guy have no part in this? A grown man should be able to say no to sex with teens and preteens, end of story. Besides, minors can’t consent, especially not to people of age. Jimmy Page is an especially disgusting example…he kidnapped Lori (yes, she did use that exact word in a later interview), left her stranded, forced her to have sex with him. Very creepy guy. Creepy is too light a word. And Miss Pamelas books show how manipulative and weird he was too, setting girls against each other - we should all stick together.
This is why I am so protective of the younger people who message in. But it’s not enough to tell girls to look out for themselves, after all they’re not the ones at fault, it’s predatory older men that are to blame and that’s a whole massive issue in itself. Too many paedophiles…(before anyone says “but they weren’t children, they were teenagers!” I advise you to look at these girls again and she how childlike their features were, read their interviews and see how young and innocent their ideas were).
Basically, that’s my opinion on this. If you’re reading this, anyone, and you think that the girls are to blame, even just a little, then I don’t think we would ever get along. We don’t need any more people making excuses for fucked up people (like the whole drama with the BBC recently, so many incidents brushed under the carpet because the famous people had everyone belive that they were trustworthy).
Thanks for the question, my rant is over!
Posted on 25th July 2014 with 1 note